


Flowers

by OctopusVulgaris



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Early BGC, Fluff, Gen, I just wanted to write something nice, probably somewhere between Season 2 and 3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-12
Updated: 2014-03-12
Packaged: 2018-01-15 10:52:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1302223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OctopusVulgaris/pseuds/OctopusVulgaris
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Church can't hate Caboose.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Flowers

Church tries to hate Caboose. Caboose called Allison a slut and shot him with a fucking tank and is a total moron.

And Church hates morons (though he has his fair share of moronic moments) and hates being interrupted and also hates repeating himself because when he's giving a long speech filled with metaphors that are almost so convoluted that he sometimes forgets what his main point was, it’s hard to say the same thing over and over without getting lost and **dammit Caboose just shut up for two fucking seconds**.

And **god damn** Caboose is a moron and interrupts Church every 2 minutes for  _something_  and doesn’t understands his metaphors and Church fucking hates it because he hasn’t had to dumb down for anyone before this rookie showed up in Blood Gulch (he read pretty much every manual about machinery and armor types and vehicle classes just to get a shot at Allison and that went sideways far too quickly) but here he is listening to this idiot explain his favorite types of flowers because  _these flowers are so different than the ones on the moon Church they’re so **green** and prickly_ because  **they’re fucking weeds oh my god.**

There are no flowers in this fucking box canyon it’s just dirt and rocks and random green patches that he thinks he’s allergic to but he’s not sure and he walks away because he could be doing something more productive in his opinion like taking a nap and he gets within four steps of the entrance to the base and he can hear his name being called and he turns around to yell but he’s getting a bundle of green things shoved in his face by this happy idiot and the only thought in his head right now is **what the fuck** and Caboose is saying that the flowers reminded him of Church  _because they’re prickly and Church is prickly and they both don’t smell that pretty but that just makes them more the same_  and Church swears that his brain is shutting down because no one’s ever gotten him flowers before (he tried to give Allison flowers once but he found them an hour later in a trash bin) and he almost resorts to yelling because that’s his default action but Caboose has such a huge fucking grin on his face that he can pretty much see through both their helmets that he just takes the weeds and goes inside.

Once inside he has half the thought to throw them in the trash but he grabs an empty beer can that’s lying around, fills it with water, shoves the flowers ( **weeds** ) inside and takes them to his bunk to sit on his shelf. And he looks at those fucking weeds and he smiles because dammit Caboose is a moron but he honestly can’t hate him.


End file.
